BMC INCIDENT REPORT #80085
CLASSIFICATION: HIGH VOLTAGE // UNAUTHORIZED JOY DETECTED
Investigator: Officer Dullard (Probationary)
Executive Summary
You are accessing the digital archives of the Bureau of Mundane Compliance (BMC). This file documents the chaotic events surrounding Citizen Kevin "Watt" Watson (aka "Electric Joy Boy") and his unauthorized transportation of a Class-5 Energy Core across Neo-Philly.
Use the navigation tabs below to review the Subject Profile, analyze the Temporal Sequence of the incident, examine Telemetry Data, and inspect Confiscated Evidence.
Objective: Understand how a single toaster repair resulted in a city-wide musical event.
Kevin "Watt" Watson
Code Name: Electric Joy Boy
Biological Data
Criminal Record
- Age 6: Short-circuited Tri-State power grid (The "Ice Cream Melt-Down").
- Age 15: Accidentally magnetized a school bus to a lamppost.
- Current: Exceeding legal limit of "Vibes" after midnight. Possession of unlicensed Zetta-Core.
Accomplice: "Nana"
A decommissioned housekeeping droid inhabiting the chassis of a Dualit 4-slice toaster. Dependent on Subject Watson for energy maintenance.
Operational Log: The Night of the Event
Navigate through the incident stages to reconstruct the timeline.
Current Location
Live Threat Monitor
Vibe Intensity Analysis
Correlation between timeline events and localized electromagnetic joy surges.
Nana Power vs. BMC Pursuit Pressure
Inverse relationship tracking the Zetta-Core depletion event.
Anomaly Note
At T-Minus 0 (The Discharge), sensors recorded a reading of "Infinity Joy." This is theoretically impossible and caused three BMC servers to resign in protest. The subsequent "Dance Phenomenon" affecting the tank division suggests a psychokinetic rhythm virus.
Confiscated Items & Assets
Review materials recovered from the Magnetic Bridge.
Subject: "Nana"
Class: Domestic Appliance (Modified)
A Dualit 4-slice toaster exhibiting signs of sentience. Currently requesting users to "Clean Crumb Tray."
The Zetta-Core
Class: Forbidden Technology
A hockey-puck-sized battery containing psychedelic void energy. Was crushed by Subject Watson to initiate the "Supernova Event."
BMC Drone Unit
Class: Surveillance
Equipped with "Gray Ray" (Ennui Projector). Failed to contain subject due to overwhelming optimism counter-measures.
Rubber Sneakers
Class: Apparel
Heavily charred. Sole thickness exceeded regulation by 400%. Allowed subject to grind on high-voltage power lines.
BMC Tank (Dancing)
Class: Heavy Armor
Hydraulics permanently damaged from excessive bouncing. "Mundane Compliance" logo replaced with neon graffiti.
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